I had this dream last night that I was sitting at a table in the hospital cafeteria when a woman in a wheelchair approached me. She was about my age with straight blonde hair and wore a white doctor’s coat. She told me that she had the results of my brain MRI and she that she was sorry to tell me that I had Mandarin’s Disease. It was an incurable disease, but I would still have to have brain surgery if I wanted to prolong my life. She confirmed that the brain surgery would only be for palliative care.
Freaking out, I asked her what her name was. She didn’t look familiar and I wondered why my surgeon Dr. Hom wasn’t discussing this with me in her office.
Then I woke up.
I was scared shitless and having a panic attack. I immediately got on my phone and Googled Mandarin’s Disease. All I got was diseased oranges. Thank God.
Needless to say, I want to try to interpret my dream. My therapist says that the people in your dreams are just different versions of yourself. Hmmm. So the successful, but disabled brain surgeon was a subconscious version of me. I wonder what she represents?
Also, I’m scared. I am just barely recovered from the hospital and my 5th treatment is today. I’m not sure how this is going to play out. I get my brain MRI results today, too (that was obviously the theme of the dream).
Let’s just hope Dr. Joshi isn’t eating a mandarin while ‘s discussing them with me [insert Twilight Zone theme song here: doo doo doo doooo].